Chelsea 2 Watford 2

It felt the same as the last time Mourinho was jettisoned from my beloved club. Personal anger in the immediate aftermath turned to a laissez-faire attitude towards matters on the pitch - especially with Avram Grant appointed as his successor. This time, I questioned my way of thinking - was my loyalty to Jose blurring my allegiances towards my club? This time we faced a fight to stave off relegation rather than a place in Europe. It certainly felt blurred against Inter when he was boss. When the Milan side knocked us out I was neither disappointed nor saddened – the final whistle was greeted with a shrugging of my shoulders and a wry smile in the knowledge that he would at some stage have come back to haunt us.

The booing that greeted some of our players last week was absent. It may have been down to conspiracy theories of who was to blame for Jose's sacking - but really it was more letting certain players know how disgusting their performances have been perceived this season.

The match began well. Yet again, for the first fifteen minutes we created numerous chances to score which we again did not take advantage of. As our momentum waned, Watford (who were excellent) grew in confidence and exposed our shaky back four which again failed to work in unison to work the offside trap (no names Ivanovic). Before Costa's brilliant instinctive whack into the roof of the net from a set-piece, Watford's Ighalo should have helped his side take the lead when he snatched at a shot - not realising how much time he had on his hands when we had played him onside.

What should not have been forgotten was that the lead up to the equaliser came from a needless foul outside the box. This turned into a corner being conceded from the resulting free-kick. The stupid handball from Matic complemented the whole episode and Guus needs to stamp out some of the idiotic decision-making from our players that results in unnecessary risks being taken in dangerous places on the pitch.

The second half brought an important change. Mikel's introduction to support the shaky back four made a world of difference and allowed Matic to probe further forward. But just as we were on the up, Watford took advantage of silly play from Pedro who decided to cross the ball from the left-back position straight out of play onto the right side of the pitch (is it not basic training to avoid doing this?) Our defenders were annoyingly asleep and although Ighalo's goal was assisted by a lucky deflection, they had no right to be even close to our penalty area as we had needlessly lost possession in the build-up.

We only kick-started into life after going behind to this goal. The sense of urgency and importance of this game was made clear by the fans who generously got behind the team while I crossed my arms in frustration at the stupidity of the goals we had conceded. But we started to play brilliantly. It even naturally stirred me into life. When the equaliser came, there is no shame in admitting that tears welled up in my eyes. This goal brought out the same emotion in me as an equaliser against the Manchester United of old did when I was a child. The manner of the build-up play and finally seeing a sense of urgency from my team touched me. It proved to me that the side does have what it takes to climb back up the table.

We could not end the game perfectly. The emergence of such nonchalance from Oscar who suddenly believes he is Messi since his nemesis Mourinho's departure annoys immensely. This was typified last week with the rabona he carried out that went to noone. This week he was nearly caught in possession when Watford had five in attack against three and he was fortunate to win a free-kick. He is someone who hopefully will lose his place until he realises that guitar solos are so passé. That penalty would have kept us out of reach of the bottom three for at least a week. He should have passed the responsibility to Costa who at least could have faced his boo-boys with a hat-trick.

This has been the strangest of seasons. It is difficult to know if the large points tally of weaker teams is them catching up with their peers or whether the more successful sides are ailing. The maths, though does not lie. We are still two points off a relegation place. A loss today would have been too much to bear. We can look forward to Manchester United and Crystal Palace knowing we have the capacity to earn points as long as we can iron out stupid mistakes. Please rise back up, Chelsea.