Valky's Blog

Three Unconvincing Points

2012-01-16T09:52:00.002Z

Saturday was a busy day for events. First the Chelsea vs Sunderland game with my old man and then a visit to the West End with the wife to watch The Nutcracker. One of these spectacles involved a mysterious man entering a household temporarily bringing doll-like figures to life. A broken toy comes alive. This is followed by a dream-like sequence of events which seem rather unreal and end rather ambiguously with noone really knowing the future outcome of events. The other event was a Tchaikovsky opera which was mesmerising in its intricacy.

It was one of those days at Stamford Bridge where the day was more enjoyable than the game itself. For the first five minutes of the match it felt as if we were witnessing a non-league match with Chelsea passing atrociously. Every time Sunderland had the ball in our half we appeared vulnerable.

We scored against the run of play with the unlucky Torres missing out on scoring one of the goals of the season but with the ever-dependable Lampard following up.

When I watch Chelsea these days it seems as if we have one goalkeeper and ten central midfielders on the pitch. There is just not enough width. The structure of the team means that we have to play very tight – and we excel at that – but create few clearcut chances. For all of Torres’ endeavour he is being forced to drop deep and attack – that should be the work of a midfielder and not a lone striker. It is surprising that he is not given the chance to shoot from direct free-kicks either.

Ramires and Romeu still stand out as our best players. Mata is skilful but slow... Meireles does little to stir the blood and Luiz still looks a liability in defence. Will Cahill replace him or is he supposed to be John Terry's long-term successor? It is all a tad confusing.

Sunderland had three easy opportunities to equalise and were quite unfortunate not to do so. The old adage of good teams being able to take their chances applies in this case and Sunderland simply lack the quality up front despite looking dangerous.

The result of Chelsea’s mediocre performance on the pitch has lead to stagnation on the terraces. Not even the presence of Martin O’Neill could muster the faithful to even have one rousing rendition of, “There’s only one Erland Johnsen”. It is even worse when one starts to think that Sunderland’s manager could have carried out a better job at our club than AVB!

Nevertheless we are still in the hunt for a top three place, a run in the FA Cup and are within an earshot of European glory if we avoid Real Madrid and Barcelona in the Champions’ League.

What I love about being a Chelsea fan is that we are realists. We do not have myopic views like Liverpool fans who think they are owed a trophy every season; neither do we try to kid ourselves that the media has a soft spot for our beloved club. The coverage of both Terry Henry and Tottenham has been sickeningly posterior-licking and yet again seems to demonstrate the rampant favouritism awarded to rivals who always seem to have the rub of the green with the media even when they are on terrible runs. Who can forget that the only reason Arsenal are underperforming is because they have so many youngsters on their books? It was joyful to see Henry offering to fight a supporter who was abusing him at the end of the Swansea match and threatening to, “kick your f*cking head in”. It was with an Arsenal fan too!

Overall the most important thing for now is for Chelsea to grind out results. If we can get a little run of wins going then we can stop looking over our shoulder and hopefully challenge our peers who on paper I see as not that much superior to ourselves. Norwich and Swansea could be tricky aways but if we could end up with six points from sides who have given many of our rivals a run for their money then we could easily start building momentum as it feels the top three are stuttering.

Come on Chelsea!

Time to admit it - I know nothing about football!

2012-01-09T12:53:00.000Z

What a difference a month makes. Having been so positive in mid-December now yet again I have doubts about our team and manager.

It is my fault really. With the in-laws over for Christmas I took them to two home Chelsea matches. They were Stamford Bridge virgins and did not pay the sacrifice I was hoping for with Fulham and then Aston Villa taking points off us. The jinx was complete when I took them to Twickenham to back my local rugby union side, Harlequins and saw them lose their only game in the Premiership so far.

It is tough to really analyse where we are going wrong. The players are just as culpable as the manager but then I keep reminding myself that I do believe we have a strong squad so where exactly have we gone wrong?

There is little more that I can add. The fans themselves seem to accept that we are not the force we once were with many simply resigned to the fact with a shrug of their shoulders after the defeat to Villa. Oh, for the club to be in the position it was six or seven years ago... and how tough it is to see a side like Tottenham above us in the league.

Chelsea 2 Manchester City 1

2011-12-13T11:32:00.002Z

There was something in the air last night at Stamford Bridge that seemed to blow a wind of change in the team, fans and club. The blustery, wet gale that poured on and battered the fans did not seem to dampen spirits in the stands even after Chelsea conceded an early goal against the team that is trying to emulate our success in the early days of the Abramovich era.

I have always had some kind of sympathy for City (not that I like any club other than Chelsea) - a team that has had decent home attendances even when dropping divisions; one that plays in blue and up until a decade or so ago had plenty of similarities with our club. One thing they will never be able to emulate is our strong, loyal away following - quite embarrassing to see their fans take less than half of their allocation considering these are supposed to be potentially their greatest times in recent history.

It was an intriguing spectacle. For the first thirty minutes of the match Manchester City were dominant and should have put the game beyond Chelsea. Some of the passing and movement from the visitors was sublime and they played with such utter confidence that my prior good feelings about the game were beginning to fade. Even the luck seemed to favour them: every deflection seemed to go off for a City throw or corner and every clearance seemed to fortuitously land at the feet of their players. I always say that a good team makes its own luck and it seemed to initially favour the visitors – in the end it was Chelsea who rode their luck and the quality of the home side eventually shone through. I was also hoping they would fail in their bid to win at the Bridge following Balotelli’s absurd celebration in front of the Matthew Harding Lower – ill-advised at best and he probably has the aroma of coffee surrounding him today.

The turning point of the game was the penalty kick not awarded to Silva in the first half. Considering Clattenburg was in charge it was a tad surprising… but by the same token if it was not to be then the Manchester City player should have been awarded a yellow card instead. The Londoners weathered the storm and began to take hold of the game especially after scoring against the run of play following tremendous work by the ever-improving Sturridge. The Meireles’ finish from his cross was quite superb considering he had been fairly anonymous up until that point.

Chelsea cleverly exploited the weakness on the right wing with Clichy looking out of his depth. After his sending off Chelsea still found it hard to break down Manchester City. The fans really got behind the team and it was fitting that Lampard scored the winner from the spot – although I am perturbed by some of his post match comments. He has not been firing on all cylinders at all this season and should not be surprised that he sits on the bench for many games.

It was an emotionally charged atmosphere and one that I have not seen or felt for quite a while. When Lampard scored I felt such a release of emotion and relief following what has been a very tepid season so far. AVB seems to finally understand what it takes to win in the league and also seems to be less naïve when it comes to taking needless risks. Special mention must go to Terry, Ramires, Mata and Sturridge.

We have tough games coming up but the last few performances in the major competitions do seem to demonstrate that the team possesses quality and the players are beginning to gel. Well done to the Chelsea fans for getting behind the team – the atmosphere was electric and it was the first time for a long time after a game that I struggled to sleep because of the euphoria from the match.

No vote to CPO buyback

2011-10-28T09:30:00.001+01:00

Yet again the club seems to think supporters are a bunch of ignorant schoolchildren who will toe the party line for the sake of it.

The CPO meeting yesterday created a big split among Chelsea fans.

The 'yes' voters' arguments are that we should trust Roman no matter what; and hope for the club to move forward and be able to eventually fund itself without relying on our generous billionaire owner as our main reliance of income.

The 'no' voters were in the main not necessarily against a move away but wanted certain assurances from the club which were not delivered.

Reading the Chelsea Chat site it seems that the performances of Buck and Gourlay at the CPO meeting yesterday were so poor that they even turned some 'yes' voters to change their tune.

The main worry from my point of view is that the club is looking for a move within a 3 mile radius but "by 2020". I do not doubt that an ideal location would be somewhere like Battersea and the club would wish it to be the case. By the same token if nothing is found by 2020 would we move the club to the outskirts of Reading or perhaps even further afield? It just does not seem clear.

Having initially being fairly balanced about a move away from Stamford Bridge (I am not a CPO share holder so hope I am not being hypocritical in any way) the lack of concrete commitment or honesty from the club - and along with seeming underhand tactics to secure a 'yes' vote by buying CPO shares at the last minute and twisting some people's arms to vote in the club's favour have made many Chelsea fans worry about the club's real desires.

It is nothing new - when you are a Chelsea fan you are always sceptical of the club's real goals and those who run it behind the scenes. We are in an age now where in order to secure revenue real, loyal fans are not the most important thing as our club is one that can fill our stadium every week.

Chelsea gave very short notice about the vote and should have started this process rolling 5 years ago. Be more honest with the fans - all most want to know is if Chelsea can guarantee that a stadium will be built roughly in south-west London. We want the best for our club and completely understand that more revenue needs to be generated (although spending £20-odd mio on the likes of Shuan Wright-Phillips should also be avoided).

Sort this out as soon as possible Chelsea as this is distracting fans from focusing on some very promising signs on the pitch.

Stadium move thoughts

2011-10-04T10:20:00.003+01:00

I come from a pretty conservative family. Any changes are hard to take at the best of times – whether it is a new government in power, some new fashion or ‘star’ invading our lives. It took me years to get used to the fact that Kerry Dixon was no longer with us and I am still having difficulty accepting the new Chelsea Football Club crest – introduced over five seasons ago.

The announcement from Chelsea yesterday that it hoped to buy back the shares held by CPO shareholders was sad news as it finally, officially signalled the intention of the club to move elsewhere. While lying in bed I shed a tear remembering all the great memories I had from the Bridge from standing in the Shed (albeit also when we were relegated against Boro) to sitting in the East Lower with my Dad and being able to obtain the autographs of my favourite players… how immensely large the stadium seemed to be to me when the East and West Stands were the only proper parts of the ground. And how before the redevelopment of the Bridge we always seemed to be miles away from the play no matter where we sat!

The argument to move to a new stadium is simply one of economics – a new stadium could (according to the media) bring an extra £50 mio of revenue a year. I presume we can sell the site where Stamford Bridge is at a premium which could easily fund the building of a modern stadium. Considering how much money Roman has pumped into the club it is understandable that at some stage he wants Chelsea to be a going concern and not a loss making club. As much as I despise Arsenal, their model is one we need to copy although one wonders how this will work when they are relegated at the end of the season together with Liverpool and … er… QPR.

The main problem is the effect a new stadium has had on a club. Don’t ask me why, but in the UK it seems to be a poisoned chalice to move. Not only does the atmosphere seem to suffer, but the seeming dilution of quality amongst the support by having more bums on seats has created a fickle atmosphere. Some out-of-town new stadia are a complete pain to get to (Reading and Bolton are not exactly walking distance from the train station).

With no bias whatsoever, Chelsea is by far the best situated stadium in the UK. There is so much to do in the area whether it is entertainment or nourishment – the weaknesses are the transport links, the sheer congestion in and around the ground and the woeful facilities. I can live with the latter because of the former. I am surprised that it has been difficult for Chelsea to create another exit from the ground behind the Matthew Harding Stand which would allow fans to have a short cut to West Brompton and Earl’s Court. I also shudder thinking about the complete waste of time that is the “Chelsea Club” in the rear of the ground and the hotel… but then again due to the council not wishing for us to increase our capacity by much when we originally redeveloped the ground under Bates (completely forgetting that during our history attendances of 60k or more were a regular occurrence) our hands were tied at the time.

There is no easy solution as there is little room to build at The Bridge. The main worry for me is whether we will regularly fill a stadium with 55/60k fans. If we do move then I would love for us to remain close to the Bridge. I cannot quite fathom what is wrong with Earl’s Court as a new venue – it has better transport links and is still down the road from the hustle and bustle of the King’s Road.

I love Stamford Bridge because of its character and I easily forgive its weaknesses. The conservative and romantic in me simply cannot imagine Chelsea playing anywhere else, but in a modern era where a club needs decent income to be a going concern (especially in a financially difficult climate) I reluctantly understand why the owner wishes to find us a new venue. I just hope the environment they find contains as much soul and variety as we have encountered in SW6 1HS.

Feelings after Norwich

2011-09-01T12:47:00.004+01:00

I went into this match full of confidence, convinced that it would not be a matter of whether we won but by how much. Playing a team that had been beaten 4-0 at home in the League Cup (albeit with a weakened side) to the MK Dons this should have been a match where Chelsea’s superiority showed – nay, glistened.
Fans were left disappointed and with some sloppy defending we were extremely lucky to get away with a win. MotD pointed out that our high defending allowed the opposition to attack with ease. The defence did not seem to feel comfortable only having Hilario between them and the goal – woeful kicking from our usually reliable ‘keeper didn’t help either.
Norwich lack quality up front and that is the difference between a team that will fight relegation and one that will look for a top three finish – the latter will scrape a draw or a win when playing badly; the former will not get results even when they play well.
Torres again disappointed and he seems to be behind the play on many occasions. He has to gamble on runs into the box more and not keep trying to score the perfect goal.
There was no disputing the penalty following a brilliant run from the up-until-then anonymous Ramires although the sending off was a tad harsh on Norwich. Lampard, who looks a shadow of his former self (but because I laud him I keep imagining up excuses for him such as “the formation doesn’t suit his style of play”) buried the penalty right in front of me. Worryingly, even with Norwich down to ten men we could have easily conceded an equaliser.
It is always a dangerous game to overly praise new players – especially when they are attackers. It is easy to get more excited because the fruits of their labour are more obvious. Nevertheless, the workrate Lukaku and Mata put in was in stark contrast to our lack of urgency in play before their appearance… I hope that they both start in our next game and at this stage Torres looks like he will be (or perhaps should be) a benchwarmer this season. Lukaku looks the size of Chewbacca and I pray he injects some “force” into the side.
On paper Chelsea has a decent squad now – it is about time that we injected some youth and pace into the side. At present, however I can’t help feel that a finish in third place would be a decent show.
How Ferguson does it I do not know – he makes players who I thought were no more than mediocre shine – that is the sign of a quality manager. Ours seemed to resort to petty squabbling after the game when the Norwich manager tried to ridiculously claim that our penalty was unjust. There are ways of coming across professionally and AVB didn’t do that – by all means back the club when decisions go against us but don’t try to sound like a 6 year-old who has lost her doll – Fergie and Wenger manage to do the moaning much better! Onwards and upwards hopefully when our new signings bed in.

Opening season thoughts

2011-08-19T10:47:00.002+01:00

A disappointing start to the season in some respects but the quality in the current Chelsea side is still there for all to see.
Stoke were a stubborn side and with the referee again not giving at least one blatant penalty in Chelsea's favour it seems we are in for the same old cliches... decisions not going our way against a side that couldn't even muster a shot on target.
Chelsea's defence look solid and the central part of the team has decent cohesiveness now. Ramires looks the part after my initial reservations.
More worrying is the balance up front. With the ball at his feet Torres looks frightening - it was this aspect of his game that sent a chill down my spine when he played against us. Other parts of his game are disappointing. Many times there were opportunities for him to make the most out of crosses by actually being in the vicinity of the six-yard area and yet he seems to lag behind play as if he is too good for simple tap-ins.
I like Malouda a lot but he does not seem to be the same player he was - on his day he looks an adequate replacement for my favourite ever Chelsea winger, Arjen Robben but he lacks consistency.
Kalou too is not a player who you can criticise for wont of trying but he lacks the quality needed to be a player who can start every match.
Essien missing is a big blow to our midfield and I do worry that we do not seem to possess "natural" wingers. If we are not going in the transfer market to add in this part of the pitch then the formation has to be changed to allow our wingbacks to attack more. This to me equates to a 4-1-3-2 formation (bear with me!) with two strikers up front. Dropping Drogba to me is a big mistake even if he is more sulky than a 2 year-old child at times.
Watching snippets of Manchester City shows they have bought quality - the real test for them will come if they go through a rocky patch. The likes of Balotelli and Tevez (why do the media love the latter when he has cheated on his wife? One rule for Chelsea players...) are the types of player who can spoil the apple cart but they will still be our main rivals along with Manchester United.
The Lukaku signing is a little puzzling and we look a little top heavy now - Sturridge has his critics but the gambler in me would like to see him playing more regularly if the future is youth.
Overall it feels like the top in football overall... many unsold tickets for our first home game and many fans becoming more unenamoured with the direction of "soccer". High ticket prices, more concentration on pleasing JCLs than our traditional fan base and biased media reporting do not help. If anyone can call Real Madrid and Barcelona the best two teams in the world with the amount of diving and feigning injury that occurred during their Super Cup match then it shows what is wrong with football today.
I am sceptical about football but modestly confident this season. My first match will be the Norwich home game... one that brings back lukewarm memories of a match in the early 90s for a birthday that must have been one of the most tedious games I ever saw at The Bridge... a 0-0 bore draw when Townsend was still on their books. More recently, I still guffaw at the admittedly puerile chants directed at Delia at a recent away match at Carrow Road... one thing for sure is that Chelsea fans' still make me smile even at my most pessimistic!
Liverpool and Arsenal look like they could really underperform this season which would be music to my ears, nose and throat but regrettably it may mean Spurs creep back into the top 4 at season's end.
I am looking forward to Swansea away (if I can get a ticket) and will try to make the odd sojourn into Europe.
Good luck to the Blues this season and I pray for a miracle!

Oh Dear Carlo....

2011-02-07T09:01:00.006Z

I had tears in my eyes on Saturday pre-kick off. A great atmosphere, a few jokey boos directed towards Drogba when he missed the target in the warm up and a rapturous welcome for Torres. On top of this, gentlemanly applause from Chelsea fans for Steve Clarke and Glen Johnson. We were back with a couple of top signings and it looked like Roman had not let the club rot as many of us had predicted he would.

Then came the teams news - Torres to start, hurrah! Drogba to start alongside, double hurrah! Anelka to start.... er, three strikers up front? Anyway, I am in a good mood so triple hurrah!

Then the game kicked off with Liverpool playing with just Kuyt up front. From the opening exchanges it was quite obvious that Chelsea's lop-sided team were struggling. We were eventually beaten by a team with better tactics and a bigger heart - a team which had its fair share of injuries and players out of position such as Johnson at left back.

The irony for me was to see Liverpool adopt the same tactics that Chelsea had under Mourinho. 4-5-1 with Kuyt the loan striker and wingbacks tormenting our fullbacks. Meireles kept making roving, unmarked runs through the centre when they attacked (as Lampard used to do for us) and with more accuracy we could have easily been down by two goals at half-time.

The blame for the performance must go with Carlo who seemed to revert to his Ranieri persona. It was almost as if Roman had picked the team with our biggest and most expensive names on the pitch at the expense of formation. Mikel had his malco hat on; Essien looked a shadow of his former self and Lampard does not look happy playing the role of midfield support rather than being able to join the attack. It is a waste of space to have Anelka playing a midfield role on the pitch when we have Malouda and Kalou on the bench: we ended up finishing the game with the team that should have started.

With hindsight, Torres should not have begun this game and the team that defeated Sunderland should have started today. I can imagine Alan Hansen laughing at our formation of three strikers up front when the opposition only had one.

The chances of us winning the league is more remote than ever. If we had won then the romantic in me would have thought we had a slim chance still with United home and away to contend with and other results going our way over the weekend. Instead, Chelsea supporters have been let down by odd decision making again that I feel will cost us should be make the latter stages of the Champions League. Even worse is to be on the same level of points as Tottenham.

As for Torres - he had a single one-on-one which he spurned but you cannot blame him for a lacklustre debut when he had so many cooks spoiling the broth alongside him. How he must be feeling today when the manager took him off with thirty minutes still to play is anyone's guess - a normal manager would have brought him on as a sub rather than starting with him. I liked Luiz's tackles and hair though when he came on!

I cannot begrudge Liverpool their win - I hope one day Steve Clarke will come back to manage us... it is more painful to see their less than salubrious fans enjoying their day while spending the game throwing Torres shirts and other detritus on the pitch - that is what hurts the most.

World Cup winning manager Del Bosque says it all

2011-02-04T14:17:00.002Z

'Del Bosque was also asked whether he had spoken to new Chelsea striker Fernando Torres after his high-profile move from Liverpool on transfer deadline day last Monday.

"I haven't spoken to him," Del Bosque said. "It's a surprise but it's a step forward in his career."'

BlueBarney's excellent dissection of Liverpool's "fanatics"

2011-02-03T15:10:00.002Z

"Let me try and explain Liverpool Football Club and why they have so many representatives in the media, why they seem to get away with anything, why they are so distressed about Torres leaving and why this all leads to Chelsea being openly hated.

It's quite simple and fascinating. Liverpool (the "club", which is like any other football club, no more than an abstract concept built on concrete facts like past records, a stadium and supporters), the fans and many of their former players show the same behaviour traits displayed by followers of major religions. Once you begin to understand this and how it manifests itself, the anger dies down.

The closest comparison is with the Catholic Church and Islam. Both powerful religions obsessed with being big. Obsessed with the number of followers they have and obsessed with preserving their beliefs even when faced with evidence that disproves or just challenges their long-held assumptions.

Ritual, as we know, is a key element to religious behaviour. "You'll Never Walk Alone" is an incredible example of this. It is sung with religious fervour and is about surrendering individuality for the group. It is a defining moment for all Liverpool followers. No other football chant comes close. And they ask everyone who hears it to comment on it. They ask us to confirm that it is the loudest, most awe-inspiring, most spine-tingling, most religious moment we have ever experienced. And it is repeated word-for-word, note-for-note before every match as a gospel choir would sing in church. It does not behave like a football chant. There is no humour, no taunting the opposition, no jolly lads getting ready for 90 minutes of support and abuse. It is born-again, wide-eyed fervour.

Repetition is, of course, a central factor to the belief system and that is why every Liverpool follower (I choose this word above supporter), is primed to say exactly the same as every other Liverpool follower. There can be no deviation from the true path. Have you ever met a Liverpool follower who would dare to say that YNWA is a dreadful chant or that talking about "history" is a load of bunkum? This kind of deviation is not allowed and if someone dared to say such a thing then the simple answer would be that he is not a true follower because a true follower would not say such a thing.

History. What is this fascination with history? Football is really only about the present and memory. It is not about history. Most supporters know all about their team. They know the great players, cups won and disappointments along the way. But history? This is something that religions do in order to create a back story on which to build a myth. Liverpool has no more history than Crewe Alexandra or Queens Park Rangers, although it has certainly had more success. Success can be measured and although Liverpool's followers like to quote their successes (and fear being surpassed), it is something that is ultimately too risky to build a belief system upon. In fact, this season Manchester United could become more "successful" than Liverpool in domestic league titles. For this reason Liverpool's belief system is built on an abstract concept (history) rather than something that is scientifically provable (league titles). In fact, the more Liverpool stopped winning things, the more "history" became the currency for their beliefs.

Only recently have we heard commentators say on television that even with all Chelsea's money and recent success, they will never have Liverpool's history. Of course that is true because nobody knows what it means to have another club's history and nobody could ever be anybody else anyway! This is a trick that religions have been using for thousands of years and why it is practically impossible to debate with "true believers".

As an aside, an interesting comparison can be made between Liverpool and Everton and one that a football anthropologist would do well to study and report on in detail. The followers / supporters of these clubs display very different traits even though they may come from the same families, live in the same streets, go to the same schools. Everton play the theme tune from Z Cars when the team runs out and talk about the School of Science. They support their club and leave it at that. I would love to see some genetic research on those who choose to be a Blue and those who opt for the Reds in Liverpool. If, as neuroscientists are attempting to locate at the moment, there is a "god gene", I would imagine it is more prevalent in Liverpool followers than Everton supporters. (This doesn't mean they are closer to god but more disposed to believing in one).

It is often remarked that there are more ex-Liverpool players in the media and on football programmes than any other club. Match of the Day is a good example where the definition of a balanced view is to listen to Alan Hansen first and then Mark Lawrenson. But why does this happen? Again, the answer lies in religion or how Liverpool displays all the traits of religion at its worst. There are not more Liverpool representatives because they have history or had success. That would be ridiculous. And statistically Liverpool has had the same number of players in the last 40 years as any other club and they are only one of about 45 teams that have been in the top division during this period, which makes it unlikely that any club would be represented by more than a couple of ex-players on television. But, like religious followers, the ex-players are believers and believers want to be heard. (Evolutionary biologists describe the meme theory where beliefs are transmitted by individuals or a group. This may be how religions survive and so the analogy holds in this case). It is essential for the Liverpool story to be told over and over again and therefore it needs storytellers. This subconsciously propels ex-players from Liverpool to become spokesmen and storytellers and thus perpetuate the myth. The only other club that does this is Arsenal, where it has convinced its own followers first and then the wider public that it has a "way of doing things". But we can leave Arsenal for another day.

And all this brings us up to Fernando Torres. He is a footballer. He played for Liverpool. He is a good footballer. He decided he wanted to move to another club (in much the same way he decided he wanted to move to Liverpool four years ago). This happens all the time. Footballers either stay at one club all their career or move. These are the only two things they can do. We are all used to it. But something very different has happened here. In fact, something religious has happened.

Fernando Torres was loved at Liverpool. He had a special status like a saint or a leader. And he became an apostate. In religious terms, this is as bad as it gets. No matter how big or how powerful a religion is, the "church" is rocked to its foundations when someone chooses to leave or step outside the line. In Islam, apostates are killed. Think of Salman Rushdie. He wrote a book where he imagined some scenes that involved the prophet having sex. This led to death threats, book burning, flag burning and the incredible scenes of followers of an enormous religion feeling threatened by the words of one man. The lesson is simple. When you are in the club, the church, the movement you do not criticise and you always follow the party line. You'll Never Walk Alone. The Biggest. History.

Fernando Torres angered his followers by becoming an apostate and daring to say that he was moving somewhere else that might be bigger. And just like across the muslim world the same reaction happened on Merseyside. Book burning, shirt burning. And to back up the meme theory, this was transmitted through the media. It was considered a subject for debate even though the conclusion was never in doubt (as it never is with religious followers). TORRES DID NOT MOVE TO A BIGGER CLUB. HE IS A BAD MAN. HE HAS LIED.

And so Torres has moved from saint to apostate to sinner to Judas figure. And he has been replaced by a second coming, by a brighter future because religions don't like to lie down and admit defeat. They are never wrong. Every Liverpool follower is now saying exactly the same thing. They did best out of the deal. They got two for one. They traded in someone past his best. They are happy. The religion was challenged but it has come out on top. They will never walk alone.

And just like the Catholic Church has a history of murder, rape and massacre from the Crusades to the Inquisition, this history is irrelevant. Only good history is history. And no other football club has blood on its hands like Liverpool but this is also ignored in its history. Just like a religion, it creates myth and worries not a jot about the truth.

I could go on about how they have created a god out of Shankly. Someone who is often quoted, even though he didn't really ever say that much which is particularly illuminating or original. I could also mention the self-pity (another religious characteristic) and their desire to always be a part of every tragedy. In fact, once you start the more you realise how interesting it is that in England there are so many football clubs but only one that stands out for displaying the behaviour traits of a religion.

Religions do need other religions in order to survive. It may be argued that through memes they create other religions themselves along their evolutionary path (Judaism to Christianity to Islam as well as the different branches specifically within Judaism and Christianity). Opposition is a necessary factor for belonging. And, for another day, this is why the new Chelsea myth exists and why "pundits" (followers of Liverpool) are openly antagonistic towards Chelsea, something which they would not do to any other club. Chelsea is a threat and must be treated that way, according to the followers of the Liverpool religion.

But I don't want to linger on Chelsea, or why Manchester United has continued being successful without displaying the same traits as Liverpool or why nobody has ever considered if Bolton Wanderers, West Bromwich Albion or West Ham United have a history. I just want to show why we all find it so frustrating listening to the nonsense that is spoken about Liverpool and by their followers. And once we begin to understand that it is like listening to a Moonie talking about being saved or a theologian cloaked in mythology masquerading as fact "proving" that miracles really do happen that we realise that we will never be able to argue with Liverpool followers. They are too far gone. And quite simply, that means they are too far away from truth, reality and knowing how to have a good time."

Awakenings

2011-01-06T10:24:00.003Z

Recent shenanigans at Chelsea reminded me of the film Awakenings where patients suffering from some sort of coma for years rise from their sleep just for a few days, have their fun in the sun before retreating back to their beds to resume their slumber to the bewilderment of their doctors.

It is a seriously depressing time to be a Chelsea fan and I suspect in several years time when we look back at the "noughties" we will rue the chance we missed to be the dominant force not just in English but European football. I can imagine many "neutrals" pleased that we are dramatically falling away as well as having the grand order of things restored with Manchester United set to yet again dominate the domestic title race for many moons to come.

The same person who helped push us from simply being the winner of the odd minor cup competition to league champions must take a large part of the blame for the failure of Chelsea now if he was also behind our initial success. It is important to look at our current slump in a historical context: a football side does not simply become poor overnight. It is my firm belief that it was Roman who decided he knew best by bringing in the likes of Shevchenko when we looked invincible and it is this undermining of managers throughout his reign that has led to our team regressing in the last three or four years. The way the club has been run behind the scenes is very Russian in so many ways - the dispatching of Wilkins for daring to question the transfer policy of the club (not to mention Mourinho's departure for similar - remember the "eggs" quote?) and some of the appointments on the footballing side of matters have been bizarre to say the least: Avram Grant, Frank Arnesen and currently some other bloke as assistant manager who I have never even heard of... the list goes on.

There is another argument of course - by this stage of Roman's tenure we should have at least one or two youth team players graduating to the first team. He has already pumped a lot of money into the club. Personally I would prefer to leave those choices up to the manager of the club - I am sure Roman would not trust Avram Grant to run his oil company (although I would not trust him to manage a football team either).

Some of the real Chelsea fans will probably find some perverse relief in this slump too. The JCLs who joined the bandwagon ten years ago will probably for the first time in their football supporting lives see our club deteriorate. I find no joy in what is happening but must admit to some relief that my instincts were correct in thinking that this football club has been veering down the wrong path for several years.

We were extremely lucky to win the league last season - the Premier League is not the force it once was with only 20 odd points separating top and bottom with over half the term gone. On paper we have a side which (at least last season) has a crop of five or six players who would grace the first team of any side in the world. This season, those same players look a shadow of their former selves. I have no idea what has happened to Drogba, Lampard, Essien, Anelka or Malouda but suddenly the squad looks quite old. Nevertheless I still believe in the individual skill of the majority of these guys and struggle to think of any players who could take their place were we to get involved in the transfer window - and most of the names we have been linked with so far have been quite embarrassing!

Those days where we played average but still managed a positive result are over - we are statistically at least having far more efforts on goal than the opposition (when we lost to Birmingham I think we had twenty shots on target compared to their sole effort which they scored from) but not hitting the back of the net. This shows what a lack of confidence the team possesses.

I will never forgive the club for undermining the modern day Clough in Mourinho and eventually letting him go and although I will always love Chelsea I find it hard to find much sympathy with many of those who are in charge. We are now going to revert to the days where we would be happy to win most of our games against weak opposition and scrape the odd win against the better sides. We will regret listening to those who classed our side as boring for having the audacity to try to win every game possible at any cost - and there are a minority of Chelsea fans in that number as well as from our rivals: Manchester United have won most of their games this season by just the odd goal but that seems ok for the media and so-called neutrals... oh to have Jose still in charge.

This decline in Chelsea Football Club will have far wider reaching consequences too in terms of trying to attract quality senior players and youngsters to our academy. I have no confidence in our manager who, like Ranieri is a bloody lovely bloke but seems to lack strength and the abillity to motivate when the chips are down. But if we get rid of Ancelotti which quality manager would ever want to join this disjointed football club?

Although Manchester United are a weaker side than they were two years ago, the lessons from that club show how important it is to have continuity amongst the ranks of senior management. Any Chelsea fan would take a top 2 finish in the league for the next decade as Ferguson's side has done over the last ten years and more.

The only thing that doesn't make me suicidal is the sense of humour Chelsea fans have... even in dark times we can laugh as we have been in far worse situations in the past. It is ironic that Chelsea's spiral lower is inversely correlated with English cricket's sudden resurgence... maybe a sport I will start following instead! ;-)

And now the end is near....

2010-06-05T19:38:00.000+01:00

It is time for me to give up the season ticket at Chelsea for a while. It has been a hard decision to take but so far not as difficult as I thought it would be, especially with press reports that we may be signing Benayoun.

A culmination of things have made me give up... the main reason is that weekends have become precious to me with a new young child so spending 40+ days of the year away from the family and hardly seeing them midweek is tough. I have also become quite unenamoured with Chelsea Football Club - don't get me wrong, I will always love Chelsea but have never been able to forgive the club for getting rid of Mourinho. The upside is that Ancelotti has proved that you can win the League (and didn't we win the FA Cup too?) even with a "nice guy" in charge although our rivals have slipped down in terms of quality this year.

There are some other grievances I have too... the club did not want to move my season ticket seat so that I could sit next to friends and generally I do not enjoy going to home games as much as I used to. Playing the likes of Wigan and Blackburn who generally bring dozens rather than hundreds of fans to the Bridge means that the atmosphere has dived the last few seasons... oh to have the likes of Leeds United back up. I sat in the Shed Upper for the past three seasons as I missed some of the atmosphere when I was in the West Upper - but chanting "Zigger Zagger" 10 times a game is not my idea of spontaneity and when that nauseous "AAAAnceelotti" song to the tune of "La Bamba" is sung then it really hits home that many of our fans are pretty clueless!

The general hypocrisy of football these days and Chelsea's lack of balls to stand up and defend itself has irked me too... how dare UEFA and FIFA have the balls to criticise the likes of Chelsea for not having the revenue of traditionally successful clubs like Real Madrid and Barcelona who squeeze all the rivals in their league for every penny in order to stay at the top. It was not long ago that Chelsea were criticised for essentially being too good - well how can the top two in Spain finish on points in the high 90s and UEFA deem that fair?

How is it permissible to take away JT's captaincy for playing nookie and replace him first with a player who was caught on camera punching someone in a bar and then with a player who received a drugs ban? You could not make it up but when it comes to Chelsea there is no limit to conspiracy theories.

The press coverage our club receives is also diabolical and I do not know why we bend over for the media who are only too happy to see us fail - oh to have Ken Bates back and fight for our club on these matters... it is quite amazing to see the difference in coverage of Chelsea on the continent compared to the UK - over there they respect us as a team. This side could be one of the greatest that ever existed and you would never really know if you only listened to what the majority of the UK media reports!

I will still endeavour to make the odd match and will probably join that herd of Japanese fans who will only go to big games - for me Blackpool away next year is a must and any dodgy away draw in Europe or in the domestic cups will be met with glee.

So well done to the side - much to the angst of the UK media we won the league (I can imagine Martin Tyler repeatedly screaming, "OOOHHH NOOO" as he did when we scored a last minute winner against Wigan only a few seasons back).

On many levels this season has been fantastic... not just for Chelsea current but Chelsea past too. Mourinho won the Champions' League much to the chagrin of many and old boys such as Robben had fantastic seasons. Our youth team is really improving and with Stoch playing virtually every game in a FC Twente side that won their league even with Steve McLaren in charge really bodes well for the future. I would like Chelsea to give these youngsters a chance in the first team (even if we don't win any trophies we can at least use the "moral victory" approach of Arsenal although I can imagine the media would not give us so much leeway). Most delightful of all was Liverpool not qualifying for the Champions League and Benitez bemoaning how little money he had to spend... just £200 mio in the last four seasons compared to less than £100 mio that Chelsea has spent!

The only dilemma now - who can buy me some match badges for next season?

The comeback is on

2010-04-03T15:11:00.002+01:00

Due to moving house I missed my first trip to Old Trafford for several years. The last few visits had been fairly painful under the stewardship of Scolari and Grant so I was not optimistic until I saw the team sheet today. What an awful game to watch - not in terms of the way Chelsea played, but in terms of sheer stress. For the first time ever I had to walk out from where I was watching the match with fifteen minutes to go because my heart could not take it any more. I can't ever remember a run-in being so tight and with so much at stake. At the time the score was one nil and had I been there for the last few minutes when United pulled one back then I think I would be on a slab in the coroners'.
I never lost faith in the players - only the manager... but in recent weeks Carlo has suddenly realised that one up front with Cole on the right and Malouda on the left is the best system to play. His subsititutions when the team was tiring were spot on too, injecting pace up front and replacing tiring limbs at the right time. We made United look very ordinary and you wonder how far ahead in the league we would be by now if he had played this system earlier.
Chelsea were superb and dominated the first half. Ferreira had lots of space to attack, our midfield dominated them and Joe Cole scored a magnificent, cheeky goal. Paulo should have put the game beyond reach in the second half but misqueued under pressure.
Even though Drogba's second goal was offside there was no mention of the blatant penalty Chelsea should have been awarded in the first half when Anelka was taken out my Neville. Nor was there any comment on how Scholes was lucky not to be sent off (again!) Lot of mentions in the Sky commentary about Rooney being missed - but didn't Berbatov cost £30 mio? If Chelsea had such an expensive striker up front who failed to score we would have been ridiculed for weeks. In terms of pride this was a huge win and a big V-sign to all the supposed neutral Chelsea detractors in the media.
There are plenty of tough games ahead - esepcially away from home. A win at Spurs and Liverpool are tall orders but doable. Today's magnificent result and performance proves to me that not only do Chelsea possess the best players but the best team spirit in English football. To be top after all that has happened to them in terms of injuries, woeful refereeing decisions against them and off the field antics this season is simply astounding, and if Carlo continues to learn from his mistakes from earlier on this season then I will gladly eat humble pie and even maybe join in with the awful Ancelotti song they sing in the Shed Upper!

Finally Ancelotti gets it - but is it too little too late?

2010-03-27T18:47:00.004Z

Finally we play 4-5-1 in two successive games and the results speak for themselves. Maybe Carlo read this blog in recent weeks? With one up front, dropping Ballack for the more attack-minded Deco and actually playing Joe Cole on the right wing Chelsea flourished from midfield - this allowed the side to be settled, defend well and create clearcut chances deep within the box. Even with so many injuries it was a performance that brought tears of joy to the eye and was long overdue.
It was not an easy first half. Villa's equaliser was one of the best goals I have seen a visiting side score at The Bridge and we faced another tepid referee who missed many fouls against Chelsea and did not send off Dunne for a challenge that was exactly the same as the one that lead to Belletti being sent off against Man City. I wonder if the referee at Old Trafford next Saturday might try to score against us in the dying seconds to deny us a chance of winning the league?
With one up front Frank Lampard was allowed to dominate the midfield and became our 3rd highest goalscorer of all time in his seven-year spell with the Blues. With so much focus on the supposed brilliance of Villa's English contingent, it was Chelsea that looked like the world class side with Joe Cole, Frank Lampard and John Terry shining.
A special mention must go to the Villa fans. I have never quite understood the Brummy sense of humour - if you find Jasper Carrott funny then you must have special needs - but to sing "where were you when you were shit?" to us when you only fill half of your away allocation and have even half of those fans leave with 30 minutes to go must mean that either their supporters have the most amazing sense of irony or are the truly plastic jcl's that I often criticise Chelsea for attracting in recent years!
Unfortunately I still feel it is too little, too late. This formation at home against Man City would have reaped dividends and given us a slight cushion going into the game at Old Trafford. I expect (or pray) that the same side will be played next week - maybe with Drogba replacing Anelka. If Carlo has learned from previous mistakes then he will have more than tempted me to renew my season ticket because if we play like this with our supposed over-the-hill squad next season then we will win the league by Easter 2011. Come on the Blues!

Goodnight Chelsea

2010-03-21T20:15:00.002Z

Having suffered throughout the days of relegation, John Hollins and Slavisa Jokanovic there has rarely been such a feeling of emptiness being a Chelsea fan as there is at the moment. It is ironic that Roman is the man who helped give the club that little push from being a top four team in England to possible world dominators and yet is also the same person who has aided Chelsea's slide back into relative mediocrity since he decided he knew more about football than the manager who helped the Blues win the league with 95 points in his first season in England.
We have another stinkerman at the helm who still favours playing the likes of Kalou (who has never proved himself anything other than a useful substitute) and who when the team is in trouble like it was today brings on Deco!
Chelsea has of course had its share of hard luck - no Essien, Cech or Ashley Cole. Refereeing decisions this season have been abysmal both in the league and in Europe. Our recent run of results means that now some will point to the off the field antics of a few of our English contingent as derailing our season. Mathematically we can still win the league by winning all our remaining matches, but if we cannot beat Blackburn while having a manager who still thinks three strikers up front is the answer to all our ills then we are going to be also rans for many seasons to come. In this hour of despair all I can pray for is a miracle, and while within the walls of the stadium I will give Chelsea nothing but my most utmost support for the remaining matches that I will attend this season.
Of course there are those who say that we should be happy with what we have. Compared to where the club was even ten years ago another possible FA Cup win on the cards and a likely top three finish would not be sniffed at. The likes of Tottenham and West Ham would kill to be in our position. But I do not want to look backwards to where we were but forwards to where this team should be.
Unfortunately the side is now regressing tactically and in terms of quality - and who wants to finish behind the teacher's pet that is Arsenal and the kid who gets all the girls but fails his GCSEs that is Manchester United? That drive alone should be enough to stimulate the manager to start playing games to win and not seek these empty plaudits regarding our so-called new flair from individuals who secretly want our club to fail.

Jose 1 Roman 0

2010-03-17T08:33:00.001Z

This was meant to be a memorable European night. It is not often that I look forward to a match so much that I am actually thinking about the game all day long. The walk across Wandsworth Bridge towards the ground swigging a beer on a warm, sunny early evening made me remember the first few Chelsea matches I attended with my father and it brought a tear to my eye.
It was certainly going to be an emotional occasion – a manager who should never have left Chelsea returning to his old stomping ground where he was so successful, and a win for Chelsea meant that with only Manchester United and Barcelona to fear in the coming rounds we would have a good chance of reaching the final in Madrid again.
The alarm bells rang as soon as the team was announced. Carlo played his “entertaining” formation of 4-3-3. Two strikers, no right wing and Zhirkov and Malouda the supposed dream combination in the left. The midfield was fairly defensive with Ballack and Mikel holding fort and Lampard stuck in the middle of nowhere.
As always we had the usual incompetent Champions’ League referee – making a big song and dance about booking players in the middle of the park but then missing crucial moments of the game such as what seemed an almost certain penalty or two in Chelsea’s favour. With no cover on the right wing my fear was that they would destroy us on that side of the pitch: in fact, Inter found most of their space down our left hand side where Zhirkov and Malouda were playing – how was this possible? Later in the game Joe Cole came on for Michael Ballack (who actually had a pretty decent game) and yet seemed to occupy a position in central midfield rather than on the right wing!
The stand-out player for Mourinho’s side was Snejder… he was simply immense and helped his side win the battle in central midfield. He set up the goal for Eto’o (a player who not too long ago was considering a big money move to play in Uzbekistan!) and was a massive pain in the posterior.
The bottom line is that Chelsea had little luck and created few clear cut chances on goal – I don’t recall their ‘keeper being very busy and our set pieces were a waste of time.
What have we learnt from this then? More importantly, what has Roman learnt? It is hard to be critical of an owner who has pumped so much money into the club but ridding the club of Mourinho looks like one of the biggest mistakes in Chelsea’s history. The club seems to be going backwards now, with an inept manager in charge who seems to want to pander to the so-called neutrals in the game instead of having that aggressive streak required to win trophies. It is quite demoralising to imagine what could have been if Mourinho had stayed but now we have to live with the consequences.

Lampard 4 Pikeys 1

2010-03-14T09:52:00.001Z

Before we begin to wax lyrical about Chelsea, let's get one thing straight: West Ham are a very poor side. They only mustered two shots on target throughout the whole game and the goal they scored came from a foul throw.
It is always nice to beat the Irons - I actually have no qualm against any of their players or manager but simply detest their fans who see no problems with aiming vitriol at Frank Lampard (even though they didn't want him at their club) but are then happy to show their support for Joe Cole - who is actually a Chelsea fan! I am guessing the IQ level at the Boleyn is even lower than that of the average Millwall fan and it won't be too long until those two clubs are battling it out in the lower echelons of the English leagues again.
The club is an oxymoron in itself with such a decent bloke as manager and yet also having a bunch of bitter and twisted fans who used to put the knife into our club because of our lack of success and now can only resort to the personal abuse of Chelsea players.
The scoreline did not flatter Chelsea - there was always only one team in it but at half time there was a big question again about Ancelotti's tactics. Carlo favoured a lop side 4-4-2 formation with no right wing... he obviously listened to me when I suggested he actually play a defender in the left back position rather than the excellent Malouda and maybe this time he can listen again and start Joe Cole on the right. Even when he is playing poorly he adds balance to the side - we don't need both Ballack and Mikel in defensive midfield roles if we need to provide supply to our strikers. Thank the Lord that Malouda had one of his best performances in a Chelsea shirt tormenting West Ham all afternoon.
Turnbull had a decent game - solid kicking, a good save towards the end but there was little he could do with Scott Parker's fluke effort in the first half. Ferreira was solid as per usual but why did it have to take a solo run from John Terry to set up our second goal? We should be thankful we have a player like him who has the footballing intelligence to know what to do when the side is struggling.
One of my big worries is now with our strikers. Anelka in particular looks exceedingly glum (not that he smiles much in any case) and will not be happy to play out wide into the run-in. Ancelotti seems to be a manager who does not like to drop big name players even if it is to the advantage of the team as a whole, so I have to give him credit for taking off Mr Glum and replacing him with Joe Cole. Our play immediately looked more attractive and we had more shape: Lampard could now roam free and was unlucky not to score.
So as West Ham look forward to playing the likes of Scunthorpe in the Championship next season, we now look forward to welcoming Inter. I watched "The Damned Utd" for the first time last night and it is amazing to see how many similarities there are between The Special One and Brian Clough. Both managers succeeded with unfancied teams, were quite outspoken and unpopular only with their own boardrooms and most of their rival managers. In an amazing game on Friday, Jose's side lost 3-1 to Catania after Muntari received two bookings having only been on the pitch for three minutes.
There is no doubt that the Italian league is not what it once was, but when it comes to the game on Tuesday it will all be a matter of tactics. Jose knows his side is not as strong as Chelsea's but he will also know that if he floods the midfield then Chelsea will struggle to create clear cut chances. Will Ancelotti have the guts to drop Anelka so that we have a more balanced 4-5-1 formation or will he pander to the view that games involving our club in Europe have to be pleasing on the eye to the neutral? It seems obvious to me that the focus is on the Champions League rather than the Premiership so let's see how our manager copes with Roman breathing down the back of his neck. Whatever he chooses, this is a game that Chelsea should win and I am extremely looking forward to having Jose back at the Bridge - and there is a part of me that wishes he was still here as we would not even be mentioning Arsenal as possible title contenders if he were in charge.

Another semi-final - well done Chelsea!

2010-03-08T08:47:00.001Z

In a bizarre week where it was deemed acceptable to have as England captain a footballer who was seen assaulting a member of the public on cctv, I was expecting more strange decisions from our manager in the game against Stoke. Knowing now that it is unacceptable to cheat on my wife but fine to punch someone in the face, at least if the result didn't go our way I could resort to violence with the full backing of the England manager and the media.
Thankfully (and probably more due to suspensions and injuries) Carlo saw sense this week and played a balanced side. As suggested on this blog previously, Paulo Ferreira played at left back (who was easily man of the match and somehow seemed to cross better with his left foot than most of our left-footed players!) which meant that we could have an even midfield with Malouda on the left wing. Yes, we even looked good with Kalou on the pitch!
This is the kind of game plan we should have adopted in the match against Man City. Stoke have a pretty unoriginal tactic: hoof the ball up to the striker and try to spread the play, then try to score from set pieces anywhere within 50 yards of the opposition goal... and with Hilario looking extremely shaky in the opening moments it looked like it might work for the visitors.
Thankfully, with no Ballack in the side Lampard was left to roam freely and could have had a hat-trick with the chances presented to him.
It was extremely sweet to see JT score... although I am not sure why the Stoke fans were singing, "John Terry, are you my Dad?" Are they implying that their mothers are sluts? Note to Northerners: for a chant to be funny it has to have a punchline that makes sense!
What was interesting while driving home and listening to 606 with the resident cockney scouser Spoony (how is it possible for the BBC to grant credence to someone who comes from Hackney and yet supports Liverpool to have his own radio show?) who allowed a Stoke fan with a cockney accent ('cos there's loads of them isn't there!) to come on his show and moan about JT kissing his captain's armband... no wonder the country is against us when they allow such idiots on the radio!
Really not much to say - it doesn't get boring going to Wembley and if our league title chances falls apart most Chelsea fans would not complain if we "only" won the FA Cup... here's to a Chelsea vs Tottenham final!

The Title Slips Away

2010-02-27T19:01:00.005Z

It has been a tough couple of weeks to be a Chelsea fan. Not only have we had to deal with the stupid off the field shenanigans of players who should know better, but we have also had the misfortune to lose some of our best performers to injury and be lumbered with a manager who as weeks go by appears to be slowly losing the plot.
After games like today I despair at where this club is going and how it is now paying for the wrong choices it has made in the past. The owner has to take some blame for this. It has also crossed my mind to not renew my season ticket but for every game like the one against Man City today I have the great pleasure to follow my beloved club to the likes of the San Siro so it is a very difficult decision to undertake.
It is easy to be critical of the side and there is many an argument that we should be happy with what we have - a club that (statistically at least) is consistently among the top 4 sides in European football... and solvent compared to poor Portsmouth - but I am not happy. I am selfish because I want us to annihilate all our bastard rivals and be winning the league every season whether the style of football is pleasing to the eye or not. Where has acquiescing to the anti-Chelsea media lead us? I am sure today was a spectacular match for the neutral but as a Chelsea fan I don't care what non-Chelsea fans think about us as long as we are increasing our haul of trophies.
For a club like Chelsea with the wealth of talent it has to have already lost five games in the league this season is simply unacceptable. How far ahead in the league would we be if Jose Mourinho was in charge of this team?
Manchester City is not a bad side - but we conceded four goals against a team that didn't even play with a striker. Now, Carlo Ancelloti cannot be put to the sword for all our ills. He must be wondering who set fire to his lucky rabbit's foot when not only Ashley Cole, but his understudy Zhirkov suffered injury. This in addition to Essien being out and then losing Cech in the Champions' League! Not only that but we had 27 attempts on/off goal in the game and yet only scored twice. But then I have to ask why he does not want to play Ferreira who has been very successful in the left back slot? Then he could play his beloved 4-4-2 formation with players actually sitting in the positions they favour most... Cole (who was excellent today and incomprehensibly substituted) on the right, Malouda on the left... etc. Maybe this solution is too simple for Carlo? Mikel, having looked like a doppelganger for Gullit in midweek (apart from the scoring goals part!) against Inter made two errors in the game today that lead to both City's first goals. He was unlucky that he was caught against Bellamy (the bane of my life!) in a one-on-one situation as another Chelsea attack fell apart. Up until that point the visitors had only mustered one shot on goal! Hilario was simply woeful and Anelka looked nowhere near as confident as he did a month ago when he was lone striker. Drogba could not hit a barn door. But then Carlo came into his element - he put four strikers on the pitch! Who exactly was he expecting to supply these players with chances to score? With no wingers he left Chelsea horribly exposed at the back as Ivanovic and Malouda were forced to maraud upfield and suddenly Man City looked like the side who were looking to win the league!
I yearn for the days of Mourinho when we would have won a match against the likes of City 2-0, shut up shop and had a balanced side. The irony is that many sides have adopted Mourinho's tactics... the formation we play allows teams to suck Chelsea in and then kill them on the counter attack.
We have ten games left now and if we do win the league it will only be down to the failings of our rivals. I am not now confident of us even finishing in the top two... where did it all go wrong?

Shock! Chelsea undone by another poor ref's decision in the Champions' League...

2010-02-25T20:25:00.002Z

A fantastic away trip blunted by the result of the match. The San Siro should be the eighth wonder of the world - a stadium that stands out like a giant alien robotic elephant... it was so large that I could not find an appropriate landmark with which to juxtapose its size!

The city too has many beautiful attractions and having had the man flu I decided to visit as much as possible in the one day I was over there instead of getting obliterated on booze. The highlight for me was visiting the historic and ancient Duomo Cathedral. As I entered the square where nuns and tourists were roaming I could only hear Chelsea fans peacefully singing in the bar opposite this enormous building much to the chagrin of the locals - this is what makes away trips to Europe so great!
The whole experience shows how much better fans are treated on the continent than here. There must have been several dozen refreshment stands all selling booze in the vicinity of the stadium - and you were allowed to drink out of a bottle if you wanted! Not only that, but the standard of food for sale was embarrassingly good compared to the usual fayre of burgers made from the cock of a dog and the arsehole of a rat that are served up in and around Stamford Bridge. There was no trouble that I saw either although the police as usual herded experienced Chelsea fans to and from the stadium like cattle whether they wanted to go with them or not!
Partly due to injuries and perhaps also because of recent underperformance of certain players, Carlo Ancelotti turned to a 4-3-3 formation with some balance and flair in order to leave the San Siro with a positive result. Instead, Chelsea left with an undeserved loss after more shocking refereeing decisions and a distinct lack of clearcut chances on goal.
Sure, you can blind me with statistics but I do not remember many one-on-one situations and it seemed that despite playing the more attractive football Chelsea were generally restricted to chances outside the box... apart from when the generally excellent Kalou was tripped up when through on goal. Referee! If it is not a penalty then book Salomon for diving!
Inter are a poor side - slow and sloppy - but Mourinho was familiar with his choice of tactics: allow Chelsea the ball but in the very final fifth of the park defend, defend, defend. His side had three chances throughout the game but they were all by far the most dangerous moments of the match.
It is tough to be too critical when you outplay the opposition and come away with nothing... the home crowd was silenced on many occasions because of Chelsea's play and you felt the home fans were easily pleased as they applauded any spell their side had in possession. Many Chelsea players were outstanding - Malouda as makeshift left back, Ivanovic as an attacking right back and Mikel as the typical European defensive midfielder... in fact, the weakest players in the team were the English contingent who were not at the races at all and as for Ballack - Chelsea matches are not there for you to increase the amount of miles you have run all season without particularly producing much!
Overall you can't help but feel that if Mourinho was in charge of this Chelsea side then we would have come away with a boring, but useful 1-0 win that would have set us up comfortably for the next leg at the Bridge. As usual, he managed to wind up Carlo Ancelotti enough before the game but was good enough to admit they were fortunate with the win. I cannot wait for Jose to come back to the Bridge for the return leg and if we are defeated then I hope they win the whole competition - something that I doubt will happen because of our reckless leadership and because Inter are simply not that good a side!

Drogba saves Chelsea again

2010-02-21T10:07:00.001Z

With injuries and illnesses in the squad ahead of the Inter game Ancelotti was forced into some changes before the match at Molineux. Looking at the team selection on a friend's mobile in one of the best pubs I have been to on an away trip, The Great Western (the bar staff actually remember who is next in the queue!) it seemed quite an obvious excuse to get the old 4-4-2 formation out. Joe Cole was obviously going to play on the right, Malouda on the left, Anelka and Drogba up front and Ballack shoring up the midfield with Mikel.
How wrong I was!
Yet again, the Chelsea manager turned tinkerman and played Malouda in some kind of defensive left midfield position, but obviously must have told Joe Cole to play in that area too! The result was that the team played with a disjointed formation that did not allow the play to flow.
One thing that Ancelotti has had more of than many of his predecessors is fortune: he is lucky to have such a world class squad that has a striker in Drogba who can score with the side's only two shots on goal in a game; he is lucky to have the likes of Petr Cech keeping us a clean sheet; he was lucky to have a referee yesterday who made many decisions in Chelsea's favour (Joe Cole's cross was so poor yesterday in the first half that the officials awarded us a corner because they couldn't believe it could not have come off a Wolves player!) Maybe it is this luck that might win us the league as well as having rivals who are not as strong as they used to be and are slipping up too.
So off to Inter this week... having never seen a Chelsea match in Italy it is something that I am very much looking forward to. I still rue the day that Abramovich decided he knew better than Mourinho and rid us of our greatest ever manager. I still wish he was at the club but being a Chelsea fan I am not particularly surprised at how we shoot ourselves in the foot every so often. You can see how Jose has instilled that fighting spirit in a team which is on paper quite average; yesterday they were down to 9 men at half time and still managed to scrape a draw that leaves them eight points clear in Serie A.
So come on Carlo, stop playing these lop-sided team formations or you will just become another Ranieri!

Drogba leads the way but what of Joe Cole

2010-02-15T09:40:00.003Z

Following my diatribe about how useless Carlo Ancelotti was picking his players it was no surprise that my choice for the right wing, Joe Cole had an incredibly awful game. His most basic passing was woeful and he looked more tired than I was climbing the stairs up to the West Upper following a heavy night on the tiles. Not only was my call bad, but then Kalou came on and had a really decent game scoring a fantastic header - maybe they did this all on purpose having read this blog?
Drogba was simply immense, leading by example - not only did he frighten the bejeezus out of a spirited Cardiff side but came back to tackle in the midfield when other players were left wanting.
It was important to see how Zhirkov did in the absence of Cole and by this showing he is going to have to play a few more games to get in the swing of things.
Annoyingly, the newspapers have got their knives out again... they will be salivating like rabid dogs should Chelsea meet Man City in the next round of the FA Cup although reading some articles today you would have forgotten that they have to play Stoke City away in a replay to get through to the next round first!
Not much else to say - we beat an average side but Wolves this Saturday will be another test. They have beaten Spurs home and away so it is not a game to be take lightly.

Carlo - stop playing two strikers up front away from home!

2010-02-11T09:55:00.005Z

As has happened before this season, following a fantastic result (albeit not a completely convincing performance) against one of our rivals we lose our next Premier League game away from home.
Chelsea played poorly last night and made uncharacteristic defensive lapses that lead to a deserved win for Everton.
Even though the Toffees are a decent side (I wish we had managed to play them 3 months ago when half their squad was injured – timing, eh?) this is not a club we should be losing to at this stage of the season… and there is only one thing to say – Ancelotti has to stop playing this lop-sided 4-3-3 formation especially away from home. What is even more annoying is that the fluidity we had in the team for the last month or so seems more down to the fact that the manager's hand was forced because of Drogba's absence for the African Cup of Nations rather than from any real lessons learnt about this side.
Despite a good result against Arsenal on Sunday the team never quite looked right and if the Gooners had Drogba up front instead of some 12 year-old boy the result would have been different.
It’s after results like last night that I really begin to pine for Mourinho… under him I feel more certain that we would be more than 1 point clear of Manchester United – and looking at an albeit weak Serie A you can see how he has instilled that winning mentality in his side. All those saying it would be a return to boring football should have a look at how many goals we scored under his tenor… and how many games he lost in his spell in charge of Chelsea… and how many major trophies we won. At this stage we will be lucky to win the FA Cup but I hope I am proved wrong.
Of course it is hard to criticise Ancelotti without sounding fickle when Chelsea have been on such a good run recently… but looking at the teams we have lost to this season in the league certainly does not bear the mark of champions – to lose to the likes of Wigan is simply unacceptable. But Chelsea have arguably the best squad in Europe so why can’t Carlo utilise them properly? We are still top but with these players we should be well clear of the likes of Manchester United and Arsenal who generally have inferior players to ours in almost every position!
Anelka and Drogba together up front will not work in the long run… only one of those can play and even though Joe Cole has been tepid at best this season, he has tended to thrive when playing in his natural position on the right wing with Malouda on the left and a lone striker. Anelka looked dreadfully unhappy last night but to replace him with the useless Kalou beggars belief.
We will probably win our next few games in the league… we have Wolves at Molyneux, Man City at home, Portsmouth away and West ham at home… these are not the games I am worried about – looking at the tail end of the fixture list we will really struggle if we don’t start beating the teams we should beat – or at the very least, not lose to them!

Burnley and those glasshouses

2010-01-31T20:08:00.005Z

Burnley was my second trip to Lancashire in a week - the previous week's trip to Preston was delightful... decent fans, decent pubs, no intimidation and a fantastic visit to the museum ... topped off by a £70 fine on a Virgin train for having the audacity to leave the city an hour earlier than I had booked! So just £140 return all in for that away trip then which makes it around £1,000 worth of fines in the last 12 months following Chelsea!
In contrast, this visit to Turf Moor which is barely 25 miles away was dark and depressing. There was an ominous police presence and the ridiculous kick-off time (did ESPN not know that there were no trains back to London if they scheduled a match at this hour?) meant that Chelsea attracted a polarised set of fans - a large minority of extreme right-wing thugs and the rest made up of the decent die-hard scarfers who watch the team through thick and thin.
Although it is always nice to be in a traditionally old stadium, the away end was a death trap in the making with only two exits for the 3,000+ fans to get out of. There was desperately little atmosphere from the home fans and at half-time the squeeze in the concourse to access the toilets was ridiculous and the facilities simply disgraceful.
Chelsea deserved to win and it pleased me much to see John Terry put in a performance that makes you forget his off the field misdemeanours. Ivanovic stood out in particular for me and must surely be just behind Anelka and Ashley Cole as one of the revelations of the season. As we left the ground into the darkness I was pulled back by a police officer for covering my mouth with my scarf even though it was bitterly cold. If only they were that quick to pull up the people who stole my wife's purse out of her handbag a few months ago!
The trip back to London was a pain too - it took 45 minutes to drive out of Burnley and speed restrictions on the M6 meant that in total the return journey took 5 hours. What made it more nauseating was listening to the Radio 5 phone-in after the game to hear to some of the criticism pointed at John Terry.
Now what he did was simply stupid and even worse it occurred behind the back of an England teammate... but when I hear Liverpool fans calling for his head when they are happy to sing Gerrard's praises as Liverpool captain having punched a man in the face in a bar brawl then you really have to ask if some fans understand the word "hypocrisy". Even more ridiculous was one Liverpool fan who in comparison reminded us all what a great professional Emlyn Hughes was... didn't he kill the career of a certain Peter Osgood by breaking his leg in a disgraceful tackle? I see as per usual the murderers have a selective memory and are more pious posturing about a player's love life than remembering how their fans got English clubs banned from Europe for five years.
The question is whether a player's private and professional life can be mutually exclusive. If you were to observe any high-profile job then look at how people in power are allowed to philander and still stay in office. Even if Terry was to lose his captaincy who would you replace him with - Rooney? He was caught shagging a granny in a brothel. Ferdinand? He received a nine-month ban for missing a drugs test and is currently serving a four-match ban. Gerrard? The only innocent Scouser in the world... The irony is that if Capello does strip him of the England captaincy then the most natural replacement would be... Frank Lampard!
It should be no surprise that another stupid footballer has done something stupid off the pitch, but if you were to look at that England team and ask who would you want to be leading and fighting in the field of battle then JT is the only choice.

4-5-1 as easy as 1-2-3

2010-01-18T08:22:00.003Z

There is no coincidence that Chelsea’s midfield flourished when playing 4-5-1 with individuals finally in their most favoured roles. The team looked balanced and confident – something I have not seen for quite a while.
With Joe Cole on the right pinging crosses in and Malouda opening up space for Ashley Cole to attack on the left, Chelsea’s central midfield could push forward and destroy Sunderland. It was an exhibition match and we could have reached double figures. Having said all this, Chelsea have had more chances to score against other teams this season but not been aptly rewarded – only in this case I have rarely seen so many clear cut chances on goal.
A special mention must go to Ashley Cole who scored one of the greatest Chelsea goals I have ever seen. Considering the stick the player gets from opposition fans on the terraces (which shows me how much they are scared of him!) and press his contribution and consistency to this side makes him arguably the best left back I have seen since beginning to attend Chelsea matches.
The problem Ancelotti now faces is whether to keep this formation when the players return from the ANC – who will he play if he has a fit Drogba and Essien to pick from? Does he drop Joe Cole who flourished playing in his favoured position?
Preston this weekend. As usual a silly kick off time for ITV – at least it wasn’t an evening kick off as there would not have been any trains to get us home on time but at least I get to go to a new ground and finally visit the national football museum. Let’s hope they have some badges on display!

Let's change managers again!

2009-12-30T10:19:00.002Z

A football team is like a stock on the equity market - when things are going well, analysts are always bullish and gloss over the odd indiscrepancy... when things are not going so well suddenly those who were so eager to back the stock become extremish bearish and trade with hindsight. So it was with Chelsea fans, some of whom disgracefully booed the team off at half-time. There is no doubt that there has been a lot of discontent from the fans with the club in recent years - never really replacing our most successful manager of all time adequately and finding it hard to encourage players to perform better when you would have thought it was a given considering their vast salaries. On top of that you have an influential media which easily sways the opinion of a minority of fans when things aren't going so well. Whereas I understand the frustrations of some Chelsea fans, booing the team will not help. Again, Mikel seemed to get the most stick when Cole, Kalou, Ballack and Lampard produced far inferior performances.
There is no particular reason why Chelsea should be playing any worse than they did since the team's annihilation of Arsenal, but the general lack of confidence in the side since the exit in the League Cup to Blackburn should be blamed squarely on the shoulders of Ancelotti who again made some strange tactical decisions.
I am one of Paulo Ferreira's biggest fans - whenever he has had to come in for injured players he has been exceptional - but to start with him instead of the generally impressive Ivanovic was puzzling. Even more peculiar was leaving Ashley Cole on the bench and giving Zhirkov a run on the left - the Russian looks promising but was afraid to take on the Fulham defence.
With Anelka out it was odd that the manager did not revert to the 4-5-1 formation that was so successful under Mourinho - maybe he could have dropped Kalou-less and played both Ashley Cole and Zhirkov on the left with Ivanovic and Joe Cole on the right leaving the midfield with some room to push up... or maybe with Mourinho in attendance he was afraid he might have been sued for copyright.
The first half was truly desperate with uncharacteristically poor defending for Fulham's goal and Chelsea limited to only a few chances from outside the box. Although Fulham had just three chances on goal all game they could have easily scored with all of them and it is extremely worrying to see how shaky we are at the back when a ball is pumped into the box.
Drogba reverted to the mean as he does when Chelsea go through a bad patch. Back came the falling over from every tackle (especially poor when at one stage the side was gathering some real momentum to square things up before half time) followed by a typically brilliant goal set up by Ivanovic. Drogba will unfortunately never be seen as a legend at Chelsea despite the best striker I have seen to play for us... neither will he gain the same plaudits reserved for the likes of Messi and Ronaldo who also embellish any small challenge against them; perhaps it is because he plays for Chelsea and not a traditional, established powerhouse in Europe.
Fulham played well although they will probably regret their naivety by not holding the ball for longer when they had possession. Chelsea were rejuvenated in the second half and deservedly won.
The next four league games on paper look like three point bankers... but that is what I thought all our games over the Christmas period would be. Although it looks like the league champions this season will struggle to gain even 80 points to win it, Chelsea should be sprinting far ahead by now especially considering how much we will miss the ANC players. Ancelotti needs to be more flexible with his team formation and with Sturridge realistically likely to play the sole striker role until Anelka returns to full fitness means we need to revert to Mourinho tactics in order to obtain maximum points from our league games in January. The manager has lost some of the fans and he needs to regain their confidence quickly.

Toothless Chelsea miss Drogba and Essien

2009-12-17T09:43:00.006Z

Sometimes when you go through a bad patch you simply need one of those games where you get the three points and forget about the performance. This was one of those games. The statistics will show that Portsmouth only had eight attempts to score all game compared to Chelsea's thirty but how they made us sweat.
O'Hara looked extremely dangerous and after conceding the equalizer Chelsea were very lucky not to concede again when the bizarre Clattenburg overruled an offside decision from the linesman when Portsmouth had three players on their own on the edge of the box. He also seemed to have invented a new interpretation of the advantage rule more akin to rugby union that football.
How we missed Essien and Drogba last night - Kalou was ineffective up front on his own and Ancelotti understandably began the game with no wingers due to the lack of height in attack.
Mikel had a woeful match following the inexcusable abuse he received from some our so-called fans during the Everton debacle... he suddenly looks like a player short of confidence despite his majestic performance against Arsenal. Applauding his substitution will not help, although I still don't understand why he doesn't go up for corners being one of the tallest players on the pitch!
Despite Joe Cole's recent performances I would have him in the team any day instead of Deco - in fact I would prefer Malouda over either of these two players at the moment.
The heads are down but the only bit of cheer during the match was Lampard counting all the empty seats in the Portsmouth sector just before he took a corner towards the end of the first half - although he would have looked like a right idiot if he had missed his penalty!
I couldn't bear to be in the stadium when they tried to rouse some applause for the back stabber Grant but last night he looked far more tactically astute than he ever seemed to be at Chelsea and on that performance you would think Portsmouth stand a good chance of staying up.
It's not all negative. Ashley Cole was world class and Borini's performance as a sub was encouraging - he did more in his few minutes on the pitch that Kalou did throughout the whole of his appearance. But the face the first goal was set up by a cross from our centre back who was on the right wing tells its own story.
So more doubts over the manager and some real worries about the strength of the squad... West Ham on Sunday which feels like a match that will be another struggle.

Carlo Ancelotti uses the second of his nine lives

2009-12-14T10:09:00.001Z

Not a woeful performance by any means but let's pray Ancelotti learns quickly from his mistakes.
He needs to take some serious criticism for recent team selection: playing a weak team in the League Cup (it may be a blessing in disguise to be knocked out but why aren't we fighting for every trophy?) and messing about with starting line-up from the side that annihilated Arsenal.
Not sure quite why Mikel gets so much flak from the stands compared to Lampard and Cole who have put in some weak performances recently, but how we missed Essien who strangely was picked to play in a dead rubber against Apoel Nicosia. For games like our last one in the Champions' League Carlo needs to take a leaf out of the book of Arsene Wenger - if you lose a game playing mainly youth then just put it down to a lack of experience... if they win then wax lyrical about how well your academy is and wait for the media to get sucked into this false footballing philosophy that has yielded the Gunners zero trophies in five years. Instead a key player in our squad was missing against Everton.
Carlo has had a bit of luck where it has mattered this season - the win against Manchester United was fortuitous (although United were lucky to finish with all their players on the pitch) and the fact they lost to Villa for the first time since the 1980s must surely provide some optimism that finally our luck will turn this season. Those balls that never crossed the line, the many penalties not given as well as sendings off that were later rescinded must surely play on the traditionally pessimistic Chelsea fan's mind as we approach the halfway point of the season.
Conversely the game against Everton was filled with unfortunate incidents - Cech will not score an own goal like that again this season and nor will we see such a fluke as Everton's third goal... nevertheless, again we look vulnerable against set pieces; Moyes' side looked dangerous every time they attacked and resembled that side that managed to finish fourth in the league only a few seasons ago. What a difference a couple of games makes for them after their away win in the Europa League and their comeback against those underachievers from North London.
Every team will go through a rocky patch such as ours but the knock-on effect from the Blackburn defeat certainly seems to have dented some of that invincibility that permeated throughout the team at the Emirates only two weeks ago.
Now onto Avram Grant and Portsmouth, a man who I detest for being instrumental in the removal of our greatest manager but also a man who fluked his way to two major finals with a world-class side... and lost. I don't really want Portsmouth to go down as it is such an easy away trip - less than two hours from Clapham Junction - but with Grant in charge I hope they get trounced this week and we restore some confidence in a side which theoretically has an easier run during the Christmas and New Year period than its peers.